Posted by: lylescott89 | October 10, 2017

It’s True, I Want to Leave Florida


Hey Kids,

It is true.  I want to leave Florida.  This is not something I have determined lightly.  Most certainly not.  I have spent many a day considering this.  There are so many reasons why and today I will name a few of the main ones.

Now I know what you are saying and/or thinking.  You’re thinking that I love Florida and how can I survive being away from my second home, Walt Disney World.  I was born in Florida.  I have lived in Florida for most of my life.  Oh sure I spent a few years in Texas and a few more in Illinois, but Florida has been my home for the vast majority of my days.  And for the record I have no plans to leave any time soon, but I relish the day that I take off for someplace else.  I do realize that there is no perfect place to live.  However I feel that I have lived in Florida as long as I have needed to live and there is a new place just waiting for me.  Will I be happy there?  Sure.  Will I have troubles there?  Of course, but the pros outweigh the cons as far as I am concerned.  Why do I want to leave?  Let me count the ways.


The heat!  My god the heat!  It’s so damn hot.  The older I get the hotter it gets (again, thank you climate change) and my tolerance to the heat has gone way down. In fact I find the heat and humidity completely intolerable.  This is the main reason I want to escape.  I find it difficult to even walk outside for most of the year.  Thus it is difficult to enjoy myself.  Yes I do like going swimming to cool off, but even then the pool is sometimes close to boiling so it is really not that refreshing.  I keep saying that I will enjoy the beach more, but the fact of the matter is I hate getting sand all over myself and I am just way too lazy to get up and go there.  As I sit here I have the a/c blasting and a fan running to keep me cool.  If I go outside I will be a massive ball of sweat in seconds.  Not minutes, seconds.  As much as I love Walt Disney World the heat makes it so much less enjoyable for me.  When I was at Disneyland and there was no humidity and the temperature was in the 70’s I could spend the whole day there.  I had taken Adam to Universal Studios Orlando shortly before I left and we were there about four hours before I was ready to pass out. I want to get away from the damn heat.


So many damn people, especially the wretched “know-it-alls”.  The amount of humanity here is astounding.  And I realize that wherever I go there will also be a lot of humans. I’m okay with that, but Florida seems to bring out the worst in people.  Those that move here from out of state are generally obnoxious.  I do not know how many times I have heard some idiot tell me “that’s not the way we did it up north”.  Well then go back up north bozo.  Or when someone says something like “Everything is so much better in Ohio”.  Well go back to freaking Ohio if it was so damned great.  Get the hell out of here!

Hurricanes.  I hate hurricanes, but even more so I hate the way people react when they know one is on the way.  As I have mentioned before they go bonkers and start buying water, filling their cars up with gas and generally become annoying.  You see these people waiting in the rain outside of Publix just to get some damned bottled water.  As if they do not have indoor plumbing at home.  Then you see a hundred people at one gas station while one just down the street has plenty of gas and no line.  Pure stupidity.  Hurricanes do not scare me per se, but I hate being without electricity.  I really feel for the people of Puerto Rico and that shithead in chief that will not do a damn thing for them other than throw paper towels.


And speaking of the grand shithead, there are far too many conservative people here for my taste.  Not that I need everyone to think like I do (although that would be great) but to see so many fucking morons support that mentally ill asshole is just too disgusting for me to handle.  I’m a liberal and damn proud of it.  (On a side note to my Christian friends please remember that Jesus was a liberal, socialist Jew with a fondness for carpentry and not a conservative by any stretch of the imagination) When I was in California I saw same sex couples everywhere just being themselves.  I saw them at Disneyland, I saw them at Venice Beach, I saw them at the Santa Monica Pier and I saw same sex couples at the Farmer’s Market.  It was a beautiful thing to see.  People just being who they are without fear of some asshole shooting them, yelling at them or throwing shit at them.  I want to live where people are not yelled at for being “different”.  That goes for me too as I often get ridiculed for being a liberal and compassionate person.  So yeah, going someplace more liberal would be fantastic.

I suppose it goes along with the above reason, but I am damn sick and tired of driving around and seeing morons with a stupid Confederate flag flying from their car.  Why not just have a flag that says “Look at me I’m a Racist”.  Oh wait, that’s exactly what they are saying.

I could go on but you get the point: not Africa hot, no assholes from Ohio that think they are better than me (I don’t mean to pick on Ohio.  Ohio is actually a lovely state with some amazing cities and small towns.  The people that live there are very nice.  I met some lovely people in Cleveland, Cincinnati and Columbus.  The retirees I have met in Florida are friendly.  The non-retired people that leave for Florida are mostly assholes) less conservatives, more liberals, no Confederate flags and no freaking hurricanes.  But first and foremost it’s the heat.  So damn hot!


So where do I want to go?  Well to be perfectly honest I would be extremely happy to say goodbye to the USA for good and move to Canada.  I love Canada.  I like the idea of healthcare for everybody and I also like the idea of being to go someplace without the fear of being shot by some idiot with a dozen guns.  In addition I appreciate the fact that they have not allowed right wing extremists to take over their country.  No Drumpf and no Pence is a great way to live.  Plus it is a gorgeous country and Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is an awesome leader.  Leadership is something this country has lacked since January 20th.  Sure they have assholes; they cannot be avoided.  However there are a hell of a lot less of them.  I realize that Canada is very cold and moving there is just a pipe dream, but it is the top of my list.  It’s not going to happen though because Donna does not want to go to Canada.  She prefers we stay here and resist.


So where in this country would I like to go?  Well I love the Pacific Northwest.  Washington and Oregon are two of my favorite places to visit and I know I would love living there.  California would be nice as well, but it is so crowded in SoCal that I probably would go nuts with the traffic.  It rains a lot in the Pacific Northwest and I love rain.  I thoroughly enjoy the rainy days.  If you think about it, the fact that all the rain in the winter makes it all the more beautiful in the summer is a huge plus.  I love mountains and I love the beauty of nature.  But I really love that the temperatures are lower than Florida.  Yes, I know a lot of people are moving to Oregon and it’s the in place, but I still want to go.  It’s not going to become another SoCal.

So be looking for me to head west in about four or five years.  I can’t wait.




Posted by: lylescott89 | October 2, 2017

Your Thoughts and Prayers are Worthless


Without demanding stricter gun laws, background checks, mental healthcare—”thoughts & prayers” may as well be bullets in the next shooting. – John Pavlovitz

Hey kids,

Like most everyone else I awoke this morning to the horrific news from Las Vegas.  Yet another mass shooting in this country.  I sighed.  I felt emotionless.  I was numb to the fact that there was another terrorist (and make no mistake about it, this person was a terrorist in every sense of the word) and another attack on innocent people just trying to enjoy their lives.  It makes no sense and it has happened so often that it no longer comes as a shock.  I am no longer surprised.  It’s just something that happens on an almost daily basis.  I am no longer crying over the senseless loss of life.  Our priorities in this country are so fucked up I can’t take it any longer.  People of all sorts of backgrounds died last night and this morning as a result of a terrorist. This affects all of us.

Las Vegas shooter Stephen Paddock was NOT a “lone wolf”, he was NOT “mentally ill”, he was a TERRORIST. End white privilege today. – David Letterman

I am disgusted that this country embraces and holds the 2nd amendment to a much higher priority that the 1st.  That it holds it to be more valuable than life itself.

Quite frankly there is no better way to desecrate and dishonor the flag and the national anthem than by murdering innocent people.  But please keep bitching about NFL players protesting social injustice.


Stephen Paddock was a terrorist. His mass killing was made easy by the lack of gun control that morons consider a ‘freedom’. – Tommy Campbell

We do not need your useless “thoughts and prayers”.  It’s way too late for that.  We need action.  We need the members of congress to stand up for the country and not bow to Drumpf or the NRA.  No one needs an assault rifle.  And don’t let me hear any shit about how guns don’t kill people, people kill people.  Your stupid little slogans mean nothing.  Especially when we have the Fuckwad in Chief allowing the mentally ill to purchase guns and promising to sign a bill that allows silencers to be sold.  How many more people have to be murdered?  I have an idea, instead of selling assault rifles just start selling the same things the found fathers had; muskets.


And did anyone else notice that the Piece of Shit Drumpf didn’t call Paddock a son of a bitch?  Probably had nothing to do with his skin color.  (Insert huge eye roll here)

I guarantee there are sicko’s out there in America right now thinking: “I can do better than that.”  Guarantee it. And it will happen. And it will continue to happen. Because our nation is paralyzed by the gun lobby. The shame is ours. The responsibility is ours. Until we do something about it. – Kevin McQuade

Today is October 2nd, the 275th day of the year.  In those 275 days there have been 273 mass shootings in the US.  You want a great America?  It starts with keeping people safe.  And do not even get me started on Puerto Rico.

Yes, I am angry.  The NRA and the gun manufacturers could not be happier as their stocks soared today.  These are sick and twisted individuals. For the record I do not care about your opinion.  You cannot defend this in any way, shape or form.

You can all take your thoughts and prayers and put then aside because without action, prayer is meaningless.

We don’t need thoughts. We don’t need prayers. We need gun control. – Jesus Christ

And Rest in Peace Tom Petty.


Posted by: lylescott89 | September 27, 2017

Willful Ignorance and no Compassion aka White Privilege


Hey kids,

This morning I awoke to a comment on my last blog.  The comment was posted on Facebook by someone I am not even sure if I have ever met.  I replied to the comment in my usual snarky way, but apparently he chose to delete it.  Perhaps he realized how incredibly racist it was or maybe he just realized that his conspiracy theories were beyond stupid.  I wanted to debunk all of his nonsense and since I did not get a chance to do so there I will take a moment and respond to just a couple of the stupid statements here.


Statement #1: Colin Kaepernick has converted to Islam in an attempt to destroy America.  Okay, it should take a person of normal intelligence about a half a second to realize this is false.  For the whole story you can go to Snopes and read for yourself.  First of all it is not illegal to convert to Islam.  In fact I highly doubt that anyone would truly care if he did.  I know I don’t care what religion he has chosen.  As a reminder two of this nation’s most respected athletes, Cassius Clay and Lew Alcindor, both converted to Islam.  And if you do not know who they are then Google it.  You can do some of the work.  How converting or not converting to Islam leads to the destruction of America is a question that only a racist could answer.

America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves. – Abraham Lincoln

DrGoodellStatement #2: The NFL plays games in the UK as part of a Globalist Agenda.  Please excuse me while I laugh my ass off.  I have seen and read plenty of incredibly stupid things in my day, but this is beyond any manner of reason and intelligence.  First of all the NFL has been playing games outside of the US as part of what they called the American Bowl since 1986.  Pre-season games were held in such places as London, Tokyo, Berlin and Mexico City.  This series of games ended in 2005 and from that rose the International Series of games, most of which have been played in London.  A few have been in Mexico City as well.  In addition the Buffalo Bills (still the dumbest nickname in all of sports) played games in Toronto from 2008 – 2012.  So with the NFL playing regular season games in three different cities outside of the US with only one of those being outside North America, it’s no surprise that someone would think they are pursuing world dominance.  One can only imagine Commissioner Roger Goodell sitting in his office chair laughing maniacally whilst slowly petting a cat.

Statement #3: This was some BS about Black Lives Matter and how the black people are all being scammed by Muslims or something totally ridiculous.  I don’t even remember because at this point I was laughing so damned hard I was crying.

So that’s how my morning started.  But it gets better/worse.  I saw a few people were boycotting the NFL because the players don’t stand for the anthem.  Again I found this to be incredibly ignorant and not just because these people obviously have no concept of the first amendment, but these people are not real football fans to begin with. What these people are doing is looking for an excuse to fan the flames of their white privilege.  How can it be anything else?  They are clearly marginalizing the players and their protests.


Why didn’t anything else stop you from watching the NFL?

Michael Vick was convicted of conspiracy related to dog fighting.  You watched.

Ray Rice committed domestic violence and you saw it on video.  Did it disgust you?  It made me sick.  Yet, you watched.

Aaron Hernandez murdered a man, was convicted and committed suicide.  You still watched.

Sexual assault, manslaughter, DUI’s, weapons charges, racketeering, burglary, fraud, drug trafficking, etc.  You never stopped watching.

Let me see if I understand all of this correctly.  You are offended by men using their First Amendment rights to protest social and racial injustice, but you are okay with murder.  You are okay with sexual assault.  You are okay with domestic violence.  You disgust me.

Wife_Buccaneers_with_background_1024x1024Look, I will admit that I love football especially the NFL and specifically the Buccaneers.  Nothing I can imagine will stop me from watching.  I accept that these are humans and as such they are all flawed individuals.  Just like you and just like me.

America is not about you.  It’s not about me.  It’s most certainly not about the White Supremacist in Chief.  America is about freedom.  Freedom to express our displeasure with the way things are in America is one of the hallmarks of the constitution.

You don’t have to watch the NFL.  However by announcing on your Facebook page that your’e not going to watch is making all of this about you.  Quite simply it makes you an attention whore.  You are not Super Patriot.  You are not Captain America.  You are one of over 300 million diverse people that live in this country and until every single one of them is afforded the same rights that your white privilege gets you then that flag you love and that song you hold so dear don’t mean anything.



Posted by: lylescott89 | September 26, 2017

Take a Knee


Hey Kids,

I am utterly shocked at the ignorance of so many people in this country.  The ignorance of people that have no idea what the 1st Amendment is all about.  Oh sure, they know all about the one underneath it and they’re happy to spout off all the BS in the world to defend it, but when someone utilizes the 1st for peaceful protest they go into full bat-shit crazy super patriotic mode.

I have spoken of this before and I had hoped we were finished, but thanks to Herr Drumpf, the White Supremacist spouting his racist views all over the place, it just won’t go away.  If you’d like to peruse my prior blog posts you can do so here and here.

Before I get to further into this let me tell you that I have been to a lot of sporting events and I have seen firsthand what people do during the national anthem.  I guarantee you that some of these same people are the same ones bitching an moaning about NFL players taking a knee.  Allow me to share some of my favorite things that I have seen and heard these alleged patriots do.

  • Spit
  • Scratch themselves
  • Run to the bathroom
  • Drink beer
  • Eat
  • Yawn
  • Text
  • Stare at the cheerleaders
  • Take photos
  • Make fun of the singer of the anthem
  • Talk

Rainna-Brown.nocrop.w710.h2147483647That’s just a sampling.  Believe me there are many more alleged atrocities that are much more heinous than kneeling.  For the record I do not care what you do during the song.  Sing along if you want.  Stand on your head if it makes you happy.  Rock the boat if you get the notion.  Do a little dance, make a little love, get down tonight.  I just don’t care.  Whether you like it or not it is just a song and it’s just a piece of cloth.  It only has meaning because we have been indoctrinated to believe it.  You know what has real meaning?  Humanity.  Compassion.  Love.  Respect for other people.  Drumpf has effectively taken these things away and turned this once “fairly good” country into hell on earth.

I have no idea what it is like to be a black man in America.  I can never know that and none of my friends who are white have any idea either so please stop acting like you do.  And do not give me that stupid line about how these are all wealthy people and they have never been slaves.  That’s like saying since I did not endure the Holocaust I cannot weep for those that did.

These players are not taking a knee because they hate America.  They love and understand America and its faults way more than you or I do.  These people are taking a knew for Trayvon Martin.  For Freddie Gray.  For Sandra Bland.  For Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church and countless others.

Los Angeles Rams v San Francisco 49ers

Kneeling is not about the flag.  It is not about the anthem.  It’s not about the military.  Saying so is like saying Rosa Parks was protesting a bus.  It’s about racial injustice.  No one American can tell another American how to be patriotic.  If you love the flag so much then you have to understand that it is meant for all Americans and when we have racial injustice, like we have now and have had for seemingly forever, then that flag loses its given meaning.

Frankly I am sick of this.  Draping yourself in the flag does not make you patriotic.  In fact I am pretty sure that is illegal.  So is wearing it as a swimsuit or putting it on a sports uniform, but there you go.  You know what really disrespect the American flag?  The Confederate flag.

And the fact that NFL players are wealthy has nothing to do with it.  You bitch about wealthy men taking a stand by kneeling yet you want to support a wealthy racist by forcing people to stand.  This idea is ludicrous.  I am not rich.  I never have been and I never will be.  Do I have any more of less right to protest?  Of course not.  Having money does not make racial injustice go away.  Just ask former Buccaneer Michael Bennett.

When I lived in Texas I loved watching Dale Hansen.  Thanks to YouTube I can still see him and I highly, highly, highly recommend you watch this video:

Please stop telling us how patriotic you are because your cousin is in the military. Please stop telling us that we all need to act like you and put our hands over our hearts during the song.  Even when I stood for the anthem I never once put my hand over my heart. No one did it when I was in school as a kid and I have no idea when it started, but again, I don’t care.  I kneel now.

We also need to remember that there is once stanza that has been omitted from Francis Scot Key’s song.   Key, a slave owner himself, wrote this stanza that mocks black men for aligning with the British during the War of 1812.  Why did they do so?  They had hoped to gain freedom from American slavery.  This is the deleted stanza:

“No refuge could save the hireling and slave; from the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave”



Real nice.  So spare me your BS about the flag and the country and if you support that maniac in chief I don’t want to hear about that either.  He has done irreparable damage to this country and standing during the anthem will not change that. So get off your high horse (I’ve never really been sure exactly what that means, but my dad said it all the time so I figured I’d give it a go) go about your own life and do whatever you feel is best for you.  White friends, when you can tell me that you have spent a lifetime as an African-American I’ll listen to what you have to say.  Until then your bitching is meaningless.



Posted by: lylescott89 | September 18, 2017

134 Hours


Hey kids,

Like many Floridians, I was affected by Hurricane Irma.  It was a week I will never forget, but really would like to.  The storm itself was not much more than a tropical storm when it got to us.  We had no damage to our home, however there were a lot of trees down in the area and plenty of debris all over the place.  What really sucked was being out of power from Sunday night until the following Saturday afternoon.  I know a lot of people south of me had it much worse, but it still drove me crazy.  In case you did not know, it is fricking hot in Florida and it gets hotter and more humid every damn year.  Thanks a lot climate change!  (It’s real and if you don’t believe it Sir Griffin has a message for you: Go fuck yourself) No a/c really, really, really sucks.

But you know what really drove me nuts?  The lead up to the storm.  People panicked. I saw people standing out in the rain waiting for Publix to open at 7 AM so they could get water.  I mentioned this before but it bears repeating; am I the only one with a water faucet in my house?  Lines at gas stations were insane all week.  On Friday I was driving home after taking Adam to see It (super scary and very well done) and there were lines at just about every gas station we passed.  However there was one with just two people filling up.  I had half a tank, but I stopped and filled up because that apparently is what you are supposed to do while prepping for a storm.

ashley-mk-2Then there was the local media.  They went overboard as usual with wall to wall coverage while essentially saying the same thing over and over again.  I turned on the TV Saturday afternoon hoping to see the TCU/Arkansas game (I ended up watching it online) and saw several weather forecasters standing around trying to think of something to say. We get it.  There is a storm coming.  Most of us know what to do and realize it is serious. Yet we have endless stories from idiots standing in the rain and wind telling us not to go outside in the rain and the wind.  Okay genius.  Do you really think we won’t get the idea if you are in a studio and show us a camera feed from outside?  I hate seeing these morons driving around telling us we should not do what they are doing.  Drives me insane.  Yes, it gives me agita.

That said, I did discover my new favorite meteorologist, Ashley Batey on channel 10. Donna said that I was infatuated with her because she never saw me watch the weather that much in my life.  She’s right.  Ashley if you are reading this please contact me to set up a photo session.  It would be an honor to work with you.  Plus, I have always thought that Ashley and I would be great friends.  Incidentally I have also always thought the same thing about Minnie Driver.  If she ever met me she would most definitely want to start a friendship.  Just like Ashley.


But we made it through and the power is back on and the a/c is amazing. Unfortunately #BaconWednesday was canceled last week and that sucked.  However it will be back in full force this week.

Of course you can add hurricanes to the long list of reasons why I want to leave Florida. I still need to get that blog written.  I was going to do it last week, but the lack of power was a bit of a hindrance.

Oh and happy National Cheeseburger Day.  Guess what I am having for dinner?


Posted by: lylescott89 | September 6, 2017

Welcome Back NFL

newpearlsHey kids,

Right now people are going bonkers as Hurricane Irma approaches.  The roads are crazy. I foolishly went on Facebook and all I saw was panic.  I need to stay off of that thing. Anyway I am not interested in worrying about it.  I cannot stop it nor can I control the weather so why waste time worrying?  Yes, I am a liberal and no matter what slimeballs like Rush say, I cannot control the weather. If I could this hurricane would take a direct hit to Mar-a-Lago and flatten that son of a bitch to the ground. There would be no other damage.  Well, maybe it would destroy Fox “News” too.  But I am not going bonkers though perhaps I should since it appears to be the thing to do.  I have water that comes out of the faucet, I always fill my gas tank when it gets to the halfway mark and I am thinking about the NFL.

Yes the NFL season is upon us once again.  And once again the New England Patriots are the favorite to win it all.  Eventually Tom Brady will get too damn old to play and Bill Belichick will get too damn old to coach and other teams will become favorites, but for now this is what we have and this is what we will deal with.


Not that I hate the Patriots.  I am completely indifferent to them.  I hate the Steelers. I hate the Bills.  I don’t like the Bears or the Jets, but I just don’t care about the Pats. I’m funny that way I guess.

Before I get too much further I do want to comment on the Bucs/Dolphins game getting moved to the Bye Week in November.  Yes I realize this is an inconvenience for the players, but let’s look at reality here.  The game cannot be played with a monster storm bearing down on South Florida.  The Dolphins do not want to lose a home game and have it at a neutral site.  I know the players now do not want to play 16 weeks in a row, despite the fact that the NFL used to play 16 weeks in a row until the Bye Week was introduced in the 1990 season.  I gather that the current crop of NFL players are not aware of this fact.  So be angry, tweet stupid stuff, but get over it.  You will live. Some people in the storm’s path will not be so lucky.


Okay, now you all want my trusty, almost always incorrect Super Bowl prediction.  It’s boring, but I predict a Seahawks/Patriots Super Bowl.  Sure, it could be the Packers. Maybe the Cowboys or even the Buccaneers could make it.  Perhaps the Chiefs will get over that hump this year.  What about the Browns.  OMG I just made myself laugh! Maybe we’ll get something new and interesting.  But my psychic mind sees it another way.  Sorry kids.

So please stay safe during the storm.  Evacuate if you must and remember that if you have indoor plumbing you can fill jugs with water.  Heck, you can use a hose too.  Oh, and go Bucs!


Posted by: lylescott89 | August 31, 2017

Message of Hate


Hey kids,

I have so many things I have been trying to write about lately including my happiness project, the upcoming NFL season, my thoughts about when people go batshit crazy anytime Disney closes an attraction and my desire to leave Florida and live somewhere more progressive, liberal and substantially less hot & humid.  But as usual those will all have to wait because of of some really stupid people that came up with the Nashville Statement.

If you agree with the Nashville Statement you might as well stop reading now because I may use big words that a feeble minded person like yourself would have difficulty understanding.  These so-called Christians released what was essentially a message of hatred, ignorance and decidedly non-Christian values.  In other words Jesus would like to slap the shit out of you, but since he’s a pacifist he can’t.

For those of you that have not read this disgusting, vomit inducing manifesto I would recommend that you do not and instead read the following plain language translation that was written by a man I really admire, John Pavlovitz.  This was written on his bog and I will provide a link right here so you can go and read it.  Please read it and then come back.  I’ll wait.

Hum de dum, hum de dum, dum dum.  Whistle while you work.  Wait, did I leave the iron on?  

Are you back from reading that?  Oh good.  I hope you enjoyed it.  The people that came up with this garbage are not Christians.  As I understand it, the teachings of Jesus were about love, acceptance and compassion.  These idiots would not know love or compassion if it bit them on the ass.  And I hope that it does.

DIcAfE6XoAEe0yUIt’s fairly safe to say that these shitheads are the same fools that voted for Drumpf.  There is no possible way you can reconcile Christianity with a vote for a serial adulterer.  It says right there in their manifesto that the are against cheating on your spouse.  I happen to agree with that one, but once you have hitched your wagon to Drumpf’s Orange Hate Train there is no going back. You cannot have it both ways.  Which is weird because you want it both ways, but you just said you are against bisexuals.  Oh the irony.

Why the hell does this bother you morons so much?  Do you think that a bunch of lesbians are going to come to your house and try to recruit you like the Mormons? Actually that would be kind of funny, but it doesn’t work like that.

And why in the world, in the middle of death and destruction in Houston, did you pick now to come out with your Hate filled crap?  You people could not sink any lower. You’re no better than that (I need Sir Griffin for this) fuckwad Drumpf bragging about great crowds in Texas while not actually going to Houston.  As usual he turned it around to make it about himself.  He even was selling shit.  Holy crap I despise that monster.  My gosh this country is literally becoming hell on earth.

If you are going to call yourself a Christian please do us all a favor and practice what you preach.  If you are going to talk it you better be prepared to walk it.  Ugh, I am going into cliche mode.  Gotta go.








Posted by: lylescott89 | August 28, 2017



Hey kids,

As I have been continuing my happiness project I have learned that becoming a happy person does not mean that you are dancing and singing with joy 24 hours a day.  Life just does not work like that.  But part if this project has made me learn how to deal with things in a different way and how to put things in perspective.  And perspective is something we all need to utilize. (I realize I am going a little “Peace, Love and Bobby Sherman” here, but I don’t care)

tumblr_o7weazI5oB1tni416o1_400Case in point; this past Saturday morning I checked my email.  Aside from the normal stuff there was a letter from a friend.  It was someone whom I met 22 years ago and while we do not live in the same area, we remain good friends.  He told me that they took his daughter in for routine surgery to remove a cyst.  I could immediately relate as I had the same procedure done this past Thursday.  He went further and said that when the doctor removed it she saw that it was not a cyst, but rather a tumor.  Though a biopsy needed to be done, the doctor was certain that it was a cancerous tumor.  My friend and his family were devastated as anyone would be if they had gotten such news.  I sent my well wishes and while I knew there was nothing I could do on the opposite side of the country, I hoped my words were of some comfort.

Let me say this right now; I hate cancer.  Cancer is something that is completely unnecessary and destroys families.  Almost all of us have had to deal with it in one way or another.  Each time I hear a story like this I get sick to my stomach.  I am sick just writing about it.  I had the same surgery, but a far different result.

It is almost an automatic that hearing bad news gives us perspective.  How many of us have seen the devastation in Houston this weekend and were thankful it was not us? How many times have we heard about bad things happening to good people and empathized with them?  Then we look at our own children and realize how good we really have it.

As I may have mentioned previously I started volunteering once a month at a food pantry.  I was there this past Saturday.  The people that come through are extremely grateful for what they are given.  Not one of them wants to be there, but there they are nonetheless.  They have children to feed and will do whatever it takes to do so.  I don’t do it for selfish reasons, I do it because I want to help people.  We are here on this wacky mixed up planet to support and love each other.  Enough of the fighting, enough of the hate.  Take a moment to listen to John Lennon’s Imagine.  It tells you everything you need to know about how to live your life.


So why can’t we have that same perspective every day?  I’m not saying you cannot enjoy your life.  You can still watch sports, go out and have drinks or spend a day at the beach with a cooler full of sandwiches.  You can even watch a boxing match on a Saturday night between a guy that has never lost a boxing match and a guy that has never been in one before.  You can do all of those things, but why go over the top nutty over things that, in the end, are meaningless?

Someone cuts you off in traffic.  Are you okay?  If so just move along and don’t think about them again.  Are they taking down a statue that somehow you identify with your heritage?  Let it go.  It’s just a statue.  You want to build a statue that should truly represent what it’s supposed to be like to be an American?  Build a statue of this guy:


Some athletes kneel for the national anthem?  It’s their right to do so.  Let them and do your own thing.  Stand taller if it makes you feel better.  Is that damn car commercial with the awful Neil Diamond song (like there are any that aren’t awful) playing for the one millionth time today.  Just mute it and wait it out.  These are the sort of things that, in the long run, mean absolutely nothing.  People mean something.  Our relationships mean something.  Our lives have meaning when we reach out to help others.  When we treat people with courtesy and respect.  As someone wise once said “just be nice”.  Or as Sir Griffin once said “just be a fucking nice person and don’t be a daft prick”.

This is all a huge part of the reason I dislike Drumpf so much.  He is a mean and nasty person.  He has no compassion, no humanity and virtually no common sense.  If someone wants to put on a uniform and join the military I could not care less if they are transgendered.  Pardon a criminal?  Building walls?  He’s a despicable human and thanks to that jackass we will never progress as a country.  That is why it is more important than ever to be nice.

beniceIt’s been said a thousand times before that we don’t know anyone else’s struggles, we just know our own.  Don’t take your struggles out on someone else.  It’s not fair and it is certainly not polite.  Live your life, be happy, ask for help when you need it and leave others alone.  Perspective.  Have some perspective.

And now that I am done with that I can get to some other nonsense tomorrow.


Posted by: lylescott89 | August 23, 2017

The High Road

Hey kids,

Today I have been the subject of an attack, both personal and professional, by a former friend/client. My business has been threatened and I have been told that her friends are half-jokingly threatening to have me killed for her. Neither I nor my family find that to be the least bit amusing.  Threatening murder is not a joke and should not be treated as such.  I try to maintain a professional attitude at all times with my clients, but as many of you already know her behavior in California was shameful and embarrassing. My business policy has always been no refunds on deposits and full payment due prior to the date of service. Once payment is made there are no refunds. In situations like this I choose to take the high road. There are two sides to every story, but I will not share mine publicly.

ThumperAs Thumper once said “Eating greens is a special treat. It makes long ears and great big feet. (to Bambi) But it sure is awful stuff to eat.” [whispering] I made that last part up myself.

Oh is that the wrong quote?  Dang it!


Posted by: lylescott89 | August 22, 2017

The Agita Files


Hey kids,

Unbeknownst to most of you I began a happiness project several months ago.  Included in that project was a desire to embrace minimalism.  Thus I have gotten rid of boxes and boxes of crap that I have no need to keep.  Essentially if I look at it and it does not bring me joy, I get rid of it.  That is something I will discuss further at a later time, however today I am discussing something else that does not give me joy and that I want rid myself of and that is my agita.  My hope is that once I get this out in the open, I can be like Elsa and Let it Go.

For the uninformed (coincidentally that is how I refer to people that watch Fox “news”) Agita is an Italian-American word for heartburn, but it is often also used to convey anxiety, stress and aggravation as well.  Now I am not talking about things that cause everyone agita, like the threat of an orange pumpkin head starting a nuclear war or going on TV to interrupt Bachelor in Paradise (which I have never seen anyway) in a classic “Wag the Dog” move so he can announce war in Afghanistan so he can get people thinking about something besides the fact that he is a white supremacist, a Neo-Nazi and and overall useless pile of shit, but rather the ridiculous things that cause agita to me. These are things that should not bother me or anyone else, but they do.  My hope is that once I get these written down I will be able to say goodbye to them just like I did all that old junk in the garage.  I am listing only a few here because if I listed everything this blog would never get finished.   You will also notice that most, if not all, of the agita is caused by people.  I guess we can come to the conclusion that all people give me agita and that I am a grumpy old man when I get agita.  We’re here to change that.

  • Al RokerAl Roker – Yes, Al gives me agita.  I am not a viewer of the Today Show so why exactly is he in this list?  Because last month we were out to a late breakfast.  It was around 10 AM and the TV at the restaurant was on NBC.  There was Al along with two women I had never seen before or since.  He was yucking it up with them like they had been friends since childhood.  It drove me insane.  I kept looking away from the TV, but each time I had to look back and see the ridiculousness that was going on.  I was angry and agitated.  Why?  I have no idea, but the last time I saw Al he was the fat, jolly weather guy in the mornings.  Why would the weather guy be yapping with two women about recipes.  And since when is Al not fat?  That made me a tad bit insane as well.  Stick to the weather Al.
  • The Standers – I have written about these numskulls before and I still hate them.  These are the people that go to a restaurant and then stand at the bar in front of chairs and try and look cool with a beer in their hand.  You can read my prior blog entry here if you care.  Did I mention they still give me agita?  Well they do.dachsund
  • Stick Figure Families – Why do people put these on their car?  They serve no purpose as far as I can tell except to say “look at me I have two cats, a dog, three children and a husband”.  Stick figure families give me agita and could have been included in the next thing I hate, which is…
  • Attention Whores – These are the people that you see putting incessant videos of themselves and their families online.  The best example I can give you is this: a few weeks ago Donna was watching TV and I had the unfortunate timing of walking through the room while this agitating story was on.  Apparently this family was adopting two kids and instead of telling them in private, as a family the adoption was finalized they thought they’d go to WDW and have Mickey Mouse tell them instead.  Of course they recorded it and put it online for all to see prompting the phrase (thank you Carol) attention whores.  Not everything you do needs to be broadcast to the world.  And an adoption is something for the family, not Cast Members at WDW.  Argh!
  • Parades – I hate parades.  Not Disney parades, but the ones that back up traffic. 1200px-Red_hot_chilli_peppers
  • Salt Life Stickers – A lot of people have these stickers on the backs of their cars that read “Salt Life”.  Is there a Pepper Life?  How about a Lawry’s Seasoned Salt Life. What about  Salt Substitute Life?  Does the so-called Salt Life lead to hypernatremia?  I just have no idea what it all means.
  • Going batty over an event – And event like say…an eclipse maybe?  I have to say that I do not understand the eclipse fascination.  People went nutty over the moon blocking the sun.  How about going nutty over the polar ice caps melting.  Let’s go nutty over homeless children.  I had no interest in the eclipse and I sure as hell was not going to risk my eyesight by looking up at it in a pair of $1.00 glasses that look like like a lesser quality than the ones I get at 3D movies.
    • Sir Griffin here to interject a few of my thoughts.  I was asked to stop by and to use foul language so here you go.  That was the shittiest eclipse ever.  It never got dark and it got maybe a tad cooler.  Many people looked up in the sky and saw…the fucking sun.  (Again, foul language was requested so I have obliged) I turned on the TV and saw a giant orange ball of shit looking straight into the sun.  Apparently he does not believe anything scientific.  I also saw people whooping and hollering about darkness.  It gets dark every damn night.  Sometimes it gets cloudy during the day and it gets dark.  Then I heard not one, not two, but three different idiots asking what cavemen thought when this natural phenomenon happened.  I have a guess.  Ooga booga, it get dark.  Ooga booga.  Me want food.  Thanks for letting me stop by and I cannot leave without saying Fuck Drumpf!
  • FYI: Sir Griffin occasionally give me agita.PARTY-BORED
  • Parties – I hate parties.  I especially hate Super Bowl parties.  I do not attend parties so why does it give me agita?  Like I said, it just doesn’t make much sense.  Other people having parties bugs me.  Back in the day when I occasionally did go to a party I was miserable.  I always ended up either alone on a couch or listening to some shithead tell me about his car obsession.  Life is way too short to waste my team listening to that bozo.

So there you have it.  I have freed myself from all of that nonsense.  Maybe.  At least I feel a little better.



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