Posted by: lylescott89 | June 22, 2009

Jesus Scared the Crap Out of Me!

Hey kids,
I know you are all anxious to hear about my recent trip and I will get to that in another entry later.  I need to first tell you all about how Jesus scared the crap out of me before we left.
Some time ago, someone from the church gave Adam a talking Jesus doll.  This Jesus is pretty tough looking and is quite buff.  He could easily handle himself in any fight, though I believe he is a pacifist.  His voice is quite scary.  You know those TV shows and movies where someone is kidnaped and then the kidnapper calls and has a really deep and scary voice?  That’s what Jesus sounds like except that he does not smile or even move his mouth.  He just talks slowly and deeply and quotes Psalms or tells you to be good.
So, the other night I was leaving Adam’s room after he went to bed for the night and I stepped on Jesus.  The voice started and I could not make out what he was saying, but it scared me and I screamed and jumped about a mile high.  It was terrifying.  Adam laughed.  The next night I did the exact same thing although I did not jump as high or scream as loud.  I then picked up Jesus and put him away on the shelf.  No more stepping on Jesus. 
I’d write some more now KIds, but I am exhausted and typing poorly.  Thank Jesus for spell check


  1. At least you aren’t Catholic. I have a friend who says his mother still keeps a fountain of holy water running at all times (the water is blessed by her priest), a heart shaped "perpetual flame" over her fireplace burns off of propane, and a baby jesus doll gets his clothes changed depending on what season it is. He also says every inch of wall space is covered in various crucifixes of all shapes and sizes. He swears he isn’t making any of it up. (on the upside, he never had to worry about vampires growing up).

  2. Jesus – thank you for spell check, oh, and don’t scare the crap out of Lyle anymore.

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