Posted by: lylescott89 | October 23, 2009

Survivor Samoa: Red Rain

Hey kids,

 

There was an awful lot of rain coming down this week, but it really was not red.  I heard Peter Gabriel sing Red Rain earlier this morning and figured it would pretty well as a title.  Red Rain really has to be one of the best songs by former Genesis front man Peter Gabriel, don’t you think?

 

The rain was relentless and battered our castaways mercilessly.  Everyone was miserable except for Evil Russell who said that the rain was nothing to him.  ER was thriving in the rain and called his tribe mates wimps and apparently wants them to vomit after every challenge.  Seems that ER thinks this is what it means to be competitive.  I do not care for ER at all and I think he is a complete jerk, but he really does play the game well.  Somehow, someway he has no enemies and no one looking for his ouster.  It’s inexplicable to me.  I’d vote him out just based on the shorts he wears.

 

Seems that those pillows and blankets that Nice Russell picked are soaking wet and useless at this point.  Don’t you wish you hard a Tarp Galu?  Yes, they said they did wish they had gotten that tarp.  Let this be a lesson to anyone out there thinking of going on Survivor:  always take the tarp.  It will keep you from hiding in trees for 22 hours.

 

I’ll say it now; this episode looked like it was going to be kind of dull.  Lots of rain, very few shots of Monica’s behind or Natalie’s legs and too many shots of wet toes.  But that all changed when we got to the challenge.  The winner would receive pizza, but both teams would be required to go to Tribal Council and vote off a member.  The winning tribe would be eating pizza in the presence of the others.  Very cool.  Again, I do not like it when a winning tribe has to vote off a member as that makes no sense to me, but those are Jeff’s rules and by golly if that’s what Jeff wants then we simply accept it and move on.  So, we had a challenge where a member of each tribe was put into a big ball and then had to guide their blindfolded tribe mates to a puzzle.  At the puzzle the girl in the ball would also have to get them to get a ball through a maze by lifting and dropping edges of a table.  Pretty cool challenge if you ask me and since you are reading this you technically did.

 

Nice Russell was spent by the time they got to the challenge, but he chose to participate anyway instead of sitting out because he had to set an example as the leader.  Watching him maneuvering across the course blindfolded and moving that ball was funny enough for any challenge, but it got even better.  He looked totally out of it rolling that ball and then even wandered over to the Foa Foa tribe as he was completely disoriented.  But then he got to his corner of the puzzle and completely fell apart.  I was laughing when he rested his head on the table until I realized that he had passed out.  His tribe mates tried to get him moving, but he was gone at that point.  Not dead, just unconscious.

 

The medical team was called in and Nice Russell was on the ground with an oxygen mask.  Jeff told the others they could remove their blindfolds.  At this point it got a bit scary.  Russell’s blood pressure was very low and I am not sure he even knew what was going on at this point.  Jeff declared the challenge over, said there would be no pizza for anyone and sent the tribes back to their camps.  After who knows how long, Russell was able to attempt to sit up, but that was a disaster.  As soon as he sat up his heart rate plummeted and he was unconscious again.  They helped him to lie back down and medical declared Russell would be unable to compete any longer.

 

This is when it got funny again.  Jeff is a great guy, but has no bedside manner at all.  When Jeff told Russell that he was out of the game he seemingly tried to soften the pain, but Jeff was really just rubbing salt in the wounds.  In trying to build him up Jeff was really just making Russell feel worse by telling him how dominant he was in the game.  That’s gotta hurt.  Soon enough though, Jeff told Russell that we would stop talking and let him rest.  Russell was obviously very upset, but as Jeff told him he did all he could and his body just gave out on him.  Poor Russell.  Except for the boneheaded tarp move he had been playing a pretty good game.

 

Back at Galu camp we had a game of try and figure out what I am saying between Shambo, John & Erik.  They were trying to reassure her that she was not to be voted out that night and to vote for Monica (A crying shame to vote out an ass you can write songs about) but Shambo just was not getting it.  Finally John or Erik, I don’t know which one as they are very interchangeable, told her to just vote for Monica.  Oh!  I get it now remarked Shambo.

 

Over at Foa Foa the two remaining girls, Liz and the luscious Natalie, were debating which one of them would be voted out.  They decided to vote for each other and let the rest vote as they chose.  Hey ladies, how about not conceding defeat and doing something about it to keep you in the game?  Go make a deal with someone.  Figure out a way to oust Evil Russell or something.  Don’t just sit on a beach showing off Natalie’s hot legs and give up.

 

Turns out none of this mattered when they arrived at Tribal Council.  Jeff informed them that due to the circumstances that no one would be voted off and no one was getting any pizza.  I think Jeff should have said that he gets all the pizza and proceeded to eat it all in front of them followed by a bout of vomiting on Evil Russell.  Nevertheless, Monica’s cute ass was saved for another week.  Natalie and her beautiful breats and legs would not go anywhere this week.  Phew!

 

TC was again, a little anticlimactic, but thank goodness Erik was there to liven things up for a minute.  Erik called out the Foa Foa tribe basically saying that Galu would smash them the rest of the way using the sweat of Nice Russell.  Kind of gross, I know, but I believe he was speaking metaphorically.  Evil Russell accepted the challenge and knew it would be game on for the next two weeks or so.  An Evil Russell never forgets, just remember that kids.

 

So, all was good with the Survivor world, except for the fact that it was raining again.  Sguish, squish!  Until next week my friends…

 

Namaste

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