Posted by: lylescott89 | July 14, 2010

Colorado Part VIII: Lazy Sunday

Hey kids,

Sunday morning had arrived and I had to get up early for church as the service began at 8:45 AM.  As most of you kids know I am not particularly fond of being in large groups of people.  As a general rule most people are stupid and smell bad so I really do not want to be around them.  Unfortunately for me this was a mega church with a 90 minute service. 

I do not recall the name of the church, but I can tell you that they had four services each weekend:  two on Saturday and two on Sunday.  In addition to the main sanctuary they had a downstairs café where you could watch the service on a big screen TV, a separate building next to the main building in which they also showed the service on TV and a completely separate 2nd campus where more people piled into a large building to watch on TV.  We stayed in the café where we could sit on couches and enjoy donuts and coffee.  I am not sure why everyone did not choose this option as it was infinitely more comfortable than being upstairs with 300 smelly people.  The café was very nice and the iced latte I had was delicious.  The baristas are all volunteers which I found amazing. 

The service was not my cup of tea at all.  The pastor came off to me as being “slick” and the sermon was about three times longer than it needed to be.  He made his point several times, but never moved on.  The music was okay, but again too much and too methodical.  After the service about a million people converged into the parking lot, but no one was saying hello and obviously no one noticed that I had never been there before.  How could they?  I never met the pastor either, but I could have told him I’d been there a dozen times and he’d have never known the difference.

After church we headed to The Elephant Bar for lunch.  It was a very nice place and was decorated inside with a bit of a jungle motif.  There were giraffes and elephants and lions.  Very cool.  The menu, thankfully, did not have any of those as a lunch option. 

We were greeted at the door by this super hot babe that looked like Giada from the food channel.  I never did get her name so for all practical purposes we will just call her Giada.  She had a gorgeous figure and these incredible legs that I could not stop staring at.  I’ve said it before, but if we got hot babes like this to run our country we’d be a lot better off. 

Our server, Austin, greeted us at the table.  He offered us some drinks and I wisely chose the Arnold Palmer, which seemed to be blended flawlessly.  I wanted soup and sandwich, but like most places they only give you half the stinkin’ sandwich if you order that way.  So I ordered a bowl of French onion soup for an appetizer and the Philly with fries for my main course. 

The soup was served in this rectangular bowl which, quite frankly, was annoying.   Whatever happened to the round soup bowl?  You get every drop that way because there are no corners.  With the square or rectangle you always leave some in the corner.  Regardless, the soup was very good.  I always save the cheese from French onion soup for last and today was no exception.  That’s always the best part. 
For my main course I got the Philly and fries as I had mentioned earlier.  The Philly came with mushrooms, but of course I had them removed as mushrooms are disgusting.  I will not eat fungus and I will not apologize for it.  I noticed that just about ever other sandwich on the menu was served on a garlic roll, but not the Philly.  I asked Austin why and he said he did not know, but if I wanted mine on a garlic roll he could do that.  I said that was fine as it was the same exact roll, just garlic free.  I never had a Philly on a garlic roll so I thought it would be fun to try.  By golly I was right!  The garlic added an entirely different dimension to the sandwich.  Each bite had the distinctive flavor of the delicious meat, onions and cheese as well as the yummy roll, but it now also had garlic and that made this the Mecca of sandwiches as far as I was concerned.  I ate it slowly and deliberately trying not to bang my fist on the table from pure enjoyment after every bite.

After the last fry (delicious too) was eaten and the last bit of sandwich was gone, Austin returned and offered dessert.  I was told they had some excellent desserts, but was frankly not in the mood for anything huge.  Austin offered me the mini sundaes and I accepted his offer.  Mini was not a good word to describe this sundae as anywhere else this would have been full size.  It was delicious and served in an edible bowl, which I ate, of course. 

I’d like to tell you that we did something exciting afterwards, but it turned into a day of relaxing, napping, reading and watching baseball on TV.  After the last few days I needed some down time and welcomed a lazy Sunday afternoon.  On Monday we were headed to Denver and a visit to Coors Field to see the Rockies take on the Astros.  Stay tuned for that one kids.



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