Posted by: lylescott89 | June 9, 2011

I once worked with a girl named Connie

Hey kids,

Every once is a while I remember something that happened a long time ago that makes me laugh.  Last night as I was driving I saw something that made an old memory click into the play position.  Since I know how much you kids enjoy silly things that happen to me I thought I’d take some time to share it with you.

I was working in a small book store back in 1987.  I am sure it has long since gone out of business and considering what asses the people were that ran it I really hope I’m right.  Anyway, I always worked with this girl named Connie.  Connie was an arrogant, self righteous bitch that enjoyed complaining about men.  I believe her problem was that she was severely repressed.  Despite the fact that she was 23 years old her parents still did not allow her to go on a date.  They declared 25 was the proper age.  Not that there were probably a lot of guys knocking down her door to get to her.  She kind of looked like a guy in drag.  Imagine Charlie Sheen in a wig wearing a long unflattering dress that resembled a potato sack and you have Connie.

One day we were setting up a new display for a book that was coming out (don’t ask me what as I have no memory of that) and I cut myself.  To the best of my recollection this was the conversation that occurred.

Me: Oh shoot!

Connie: (Aghast) Watch your language!

Me: What language?  All I said was shoot.

C:  That’s just as bad.  If you use another word to replace a curse word it’s the same as cursing.

Me:  No shit!

At that remark Connie went to the manager and told him what I did and refused to work with me the rest of the day.  It was probably the best day of work I ever had there.



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