Posted by: lylescott89 | May 1, 2013

The Make a Poor Schlub’s Wish Come True Foundation

Hey kids,

I have always been honest with you kids and shared many of my life experiences with you.  Today is no exception.  Most of you will not be surprised when I tell you that I despise my job.  It’s true though.  I hate it with a passion.  I hate every single second of every day I have to be here. Oh it wasn’t always this way, but it has been an endless nightmare since July 1, 2009 when the powers that be decided to transfer me to a different unit for a “six month trial”.  I am still there in that den of iniquity.  My work is monotonous and does not change from day to day.  It is always 100% exactly the same.  Yuck.  So to say that I spend 40 hours a week in pure misery is an understatement.  The happy guy you see above is depressed and miserable five days a week at this dead end job.  It is very sad.

So why am I telling you about my misery?  Well I was thinking about the Make-a-Wish Foundation and the work it does for ill children.  I then had a thought and wondered if it would work.  Why not have a make a wish program for the poor schlubs like me?  Seriously, why not?  I cannot (hopefully) be the only one that spent thousands of dollars and years of hard work to get a college degree only to find that I would never get a decent job that actually utilized my skills and talents.  I cannot be the only one that spends endless hours fighting commuter traffic to come to a dingy office and work for peanuts.  I know I am not the only one that had dreams of a really cool career devolve into an endless nightmare.  I think it is an excellent idea and I also think I should be the first recipient.

In my humble opinion, one must meet the following requirements to qualify for the Make a Poor Schlub’s Wish Come True Foundation:

• Must be in the same dead end job for 10 consecutive years or more
• Must totally hate and despise said job
• Must have at least a four year degree from an accredited college or university that is essentially useless in your current profession
• Must commute in heavy traffic at least five days per week or be forced to use public transportation to get to your nightmare

I am resigned to the fact that as much as I try to get out of this bad dream, I may never do so.  I have not yet given up, _o_92017but my spirit is broken and my energy to find something else is at an all-time low.  That is why I am asking for this wish today.  I want to be the first wish recipient of the Make a Poor Schlub’s Wish Come True Foundation.  All I am asking for is this one wish and after that I will stop complaining complain less about this hell pit in which I work.  So if you will please read my wish and see if you can make it come true I would really appreciate it.  I cannot pay anyone for this wish.  The wish is granted without the expectation of any monetary gain.

My wish is to spend a day photographing beautiful Hooters girls in bikinis.  Let me reiterate that for just one day I want to take photographs of Hooters girls in bikinis.  Just like the pros do, I want to set up at the beach and take photos and then at a fancy pool for a few hours afterwards.  It could be one girl or it could be a few.  Both setups work for me.  We should also have a break for a delicious catered lunch.

Now I know that the photographers that do this sort of thing work very hard and do excellent work.  I know that this is not an easy job and not nearly as glamorous as one would expect it to be, but I don’t care.  I want a day that I can live a fantasy or rather; I need a day where I can live out my fantasy.  As most of you know I take numerous photos of the girls at Hooters when I go there and that’s great.  I truly enjoy that, but that’s a minute or two for just a couple of photos.  And with a point and click camera.  No, I want a full day with a real nice camera.  (Someone will have to allow me to borrow a camera for this too.  Thanks!)  I want to see what it is really like to do something that, in my mind, sounds like a lot of fun.  And don’t worry; I will be completely professional with the ladies.  I am not asking for any nude shots whatsoever.  No, I want bikini and swimsuit shots and if they want I would be happy to take photos of them in their work uniforms.  The picture possibilities are almost endless.

Is there anyone out there that can help me out with my wish?  Does anyone know Casey Luckey because she would be my first choice as a model?  If you know someone that can help make a poor schlub’s wish come true please help me out and get this deal set up.  I don’t feel like I am asking for that much.  Is there a Hooters girl out there reading this that can assist me in this endeavor?  Please, for my sanity, help me out.  Thank you all.




  1. Ask Stephenie.

    • Ask Stephenie to borrow the camera or supply the model? Oh my gosh does she know Casey Luckey?

  2. Ask Stephenie if you can tag along and assist if she ever gets a photo shoot with bikini models. Or perhaps Steph can set up a photo shoot for you.

    • I guess you missed my point; I do not want to tag along and assist. I want this to be all about me.

  3. […] a day at my fantasy career: photographing a Hooters swimsuit model. a. Yes I have mentioned this before, but thus far no one has come forward to help me achieve this goal.  I cannot do this myself. b. […]

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